We’ve all been there. Well, some of us have. The “job” starts sucking the life out of you. Getting you down. Stressing you out. You feel like there’s no escape.
I’m having that experience lately, and it isn’t the first time. I can accept that maybe this routine I’ve come to live over and over again is partly my fault, for caring about the work I do and wanting to excel.
But enough is enough, right?
Corporations are cutting back, eliminating jobs but not lowering their expectations of what their employees must produce and be accountable for each day.
Lean is one thing. Skeletal and anemic is something else.
So this past week when I felt the crush of work demand just a little too severely, I allowed myself a momentary meltdown. No husbands or pets were harmed in this incident, and no snap decisions made about the course of my career. I simply allowed myself a couple hours to let the bad experience eat me up.
I swallowed two acetaminophens, got into my jammies and clammed up. Well, first I let the tears flow.
Cathartic, maybe. Weak, eh. I don’t care. I needed a release and that was all I had in me.
I have been told by several people that they see me as an exceptionally strong person, capable of handling adversity and struggle. Looking at my history, I can agree with that. We all have our junk to deal with, and my methods of doing so have generally been healthy ones.
But a person can tire of being resilient. Still, I guess I bounce back pretty well. By the next morning, I was on to the new day and my 45-minute commute, for once, served a positive purpose. I turned on the radio and resisted the news channels. I switched on my favorite music station and stayed in the moment all the way to work. It was just the tonic I needed to set me on a better course.
From Queen’s “39” to Dave Loggins’ “Please Come to Boston” and Heatwave’s “Groove Line,” I let my physical reaction to this audio medicine flow. Bouncing along in the driver’s seat, I literally drove myself to a better mental place.
It’s a start. Will I maintain the positive attitude? There are no guarantees. All we can do is keep fighting the good fight. Who doesn’t have something they struggle with? I’m working on keeping a good focus, and looking ahead to the next good thing. It’s just a matter of time.
Thank God for music, good husbands and pets, and yes, 45-minute commutes.